Lameness

There is a new thing going around Facebook- people write a "note" with 25 things that people probably don't know about them. They then "tag" 25 friends in hopes that they will do the same. 

I was tagged. 

I wrote a note. 

I am publishing it there and here because I am lazy and tired and don't have the enthusiasm to write a real post right now. 

1. I threw up Chef Boyardee ravioli in junior high and haven’t eaten it since. 

2. I used to collect snails in a cardboard box. 

3. I tell people I have three boobs, and a lot of them believe it. 

4. My favorite flavor Starburst is lemon, but I do not typically care for lemon desserts

5. When I was younger I could eat half a pan of PARTY-sized Sam’s lasagna by myself

6. I once wrapped a birthday present in a watermelon. 

7. I am deathly afraid of swimming pool drains. 

8. I often cry when I see cute old people. Like old people slowly pushing grocery carts down the aisle. Or old people who shake while feeding themselves and bits of their food fall off their utensils. 

9. I try to keep a case of water in my car and give bottles to homeless people on the streets. 

10. I have a dead dried up frog (Paul Bunyan) hanging on my wall in a plastic bag in Odessa

11. I like eating cold macaroni and cheese

12. When I see a UPS truck drive by, I stick my thumb up for good luck

13. I put on sock shoe sock shoe 90% of the time (instead of sock sock shoe shoe like most everybody else)

14. I hate brushing my teeth and taking showers. (But still do them both regularly)

15. I have a soft spot for all foods FRIED or BAKED

16. I don’t like people to watch my mouth, such as when I’m drinking from their glass or taking a bite off of their fork.

17. I was in love with Michael Jackson as a youngn’….And mortified when my cousin informed me that he used to be black. 

18. I still remember in third grade when a boy who will remain unnamed told me “you stink” on the playground… That was the day I started wearing deodorant. 

19. I believe there is good in everyone- even convicted serial killers and baby murderers. 

20. In elementary school I had an imaginary friend named Michael who lived in the vents and had conversations with me during class and while on the toilet. 

21. My guilty pleasure food is movie theatre popcorn with butter. 

22. I secretly like my cat Emma. 

23. I cried today when I was told I had four tiny cavities in my back teeth. I’ve always been super proud of my cavity-free streak. 

24. I feel like a failure when I screw up baking a dessert and don’t like to tell people. 

25. I like looking at the backs of people’s ears. They look like fetuses.